Washington D. C., October 30, 2009 (Sarcastic Comment by eGrumps)
The White House (“WH”) proudly announced that the Health Care Bill (“Obamacare”) presented by Speaker Pelosi to the American people met all governmental criteria. More important than the size of the fiscal deficit that would follow the bill, assuming it becomes law, was the physical size of the Bill.
The White House has always had two criteria: (1) the cost to the American fiscal system could not exceed $1,000,000,000,000 and (2) the physical size of the bill could not exceed 2,000 pages. Speaker Pelosi deserves much credit for bringing the bill in at 1990 pages. Had tort reform stayed in, they were sure that the size would be greater than 2,000 pages, and by this one small deletion, the WH achieved its goal of a 2,000 page physical size limitation.
While the size of the deficit could not be accurately measured, except by independent WH accountants (all others being suspect), the size of the resulting deficit will be “close enough” for government work, and the WH accountants were confident the cost would be less than previously anticipated. If there was to be a cost overrun, the deficit could be reduced by a national sales tax of 15% and the effect upon America’s economy would be minimal.
In order to forestall criticism of this and future bills, the WH signed an Executive Order which abolished the independent Congressional Budget Office (the “CBO”) and established a truly independent White House Budget Office (the “WHBO”) . The WHBO will forestall much future criticism of the cost of laws proposed by the President by performing its function, independently, by Board Members selected by the President to serve at his pleasure.
Obamacare is a winner,” The spokesman announced, “And the limited physical size of the bill should be enough to silence all of the ignorant critics who have never had the foresight to take a speed reading course. Anyone can write a bill to be more than 2000 pages, but it takes a real political, diplomatic and physical genius to trim the bill down to mere skeletal size so it can be read and understood by the President and his staff, the Congress and the American People. Madam Speaker, your editorial genius will go down in history in limiting the size of the Obamacare legislation. The Administration and the American people are proud of you.”
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