NEWS FLASH! Washington D.C.  (Exclusive to eGrumps News Service) The Office of the President is pleased to announce that the unemployment rate in America has been reduced to 0%. Deciding that anyone who is out of work, regardless of the length of time, will no longer be deemed a part of the work force. As [...]

The following is well worth reading – eGrumps, the writer – details his recent vacation following the example of our President. As you might have gathered in reading the newspapers or listening to the TV, or following the many blogs where the news seems slightly more reliable, depending, of course, on which blog you read. [...]

Sacramento.  CA eGrumps having learned of the upcoming Los Angeles traffic catastrophe has issued the following concerning the coming Freeway closing in Los Angeles, CA. On July 15-16 the San Diego freeway (Rte 405) will be closed for about ten miles, between Santa Monica Blvd. and Ventura Blvd. while Caltrans demolishes 1/2 of a bridge [...]

The new buzz words out of Washington, from President Obama,  Attorney General Holder and Director of Homeland Security, Janet N.: “potential to lead to racial profiling.” Now that someone in Washington has finally read the Arizona law and found it bans racial profiling, a new approach has been advanced to show the heinous nature of [...]

Internet Maxims: Great groups from little icons grow. Speak softly and carry a cell phone. The email of the species is more deadly than the mail. Too many clicks spoil the browse. Oh, what a tangled website we weave. A chat has nine lives. Home is where you hang your @. What boots up must [...]

Exclusive to eGrumps Washington, D. C. (April 2, 2010) In a plan to reduce unemployment, and continuing the modest gains of March, 2010, the Administration announced a new policy.  In March, 2010, there were 162,000 employees added to the work force, according to preliminary figures.  Of these jobs, 48,000 consisted of temporary workers hired for [...]

Washington D. C. February 25, 2010                                                                   Special to eGrumps In an effort to defuse scathing criticism about the lack of transparency  in [...]

In considering Obamacare for the masses (that’s most of you (but not me)) attention has been given to funeral parlors, funeral plots and funeral plans for the 21st century. While not formally a part of Obamacare, an intelligent (?) discussion in the White House, between various czar planners for Obamacare considered the following in order [...]

Washington D. C. February 11, 2010                  (exclusive to eGrumps) Strong criticism has been levied at Governor Pallin’s use of her hand to store crib notes for her speech at the Tea Party Convention. Various reasons for the criticism have been advanced including an allegation that she obviously [...]

Washington, D. C. February 3, 2010               (Leaked to eGrumps by anonymous sources in the White House.) The Chinese government has suggested it would not be in America’s best interests to meet with the Dalai Lama because, among other things, it would damage “trust and cooperation” between the two [...]

Washington, D. C. (February 2, 2010)           (Not exclusive to eGrumps) A special slightly schizophrenic alert has been issued: February 2, 2010: In Nashua, New Hampshire President Obama stated “When times are tough….You don’t blow a bunch of cash on Vegas when you’re trying to save for college.” (I think most [...]

The Los Angeles Times Business News (January 23, 2010) spotlighted Two (2) major headlines in its Business Section; 1. “Dow posts triple-digit loss again” and 2. Conan makes way for Jay.” The third major headline (not on the top of the page, however) was “Signs Point to Exec’s Affair.” eGrumps says; “That says it all [...]

Washington, D. C. (Exclusive to Grumps (January 20, 2010) Four major computer makers, who asked that their names not be divulged since their products were still under development, held a press conference in Washington D. C. announcing the development of a super mini computer for post-death use. The new machines had been designed to fit [...]

Washington, D. C. (January 8, 2010) (Special to eGrumps) The Department of Homeland Security after an exhaustive review of the “security measures” in place to protect our country is instituting a  novel approach to provide greater security for Americans. Legal Aliens, and Illegal Aliens residing in the United States. Citing the difficulty in not providing [...]

Washington, D. C. (January 1, 2010) After considering various options for the trial of the alleged terrorist (the “Underwear  Bomber”) the DOJ decided to indite him on indecent exposure. Citing the difficulties in getting a conviction for acts of terrorism, attempted murder, and bad-conduct on an airplane, career political (and senior) attorneys from the Department [...]

Washington D. C. December 14, 2009                               (Satirical News from eGrumps) The organizers of the “Who I Would Least Like to be Stranded With on a Tropical Island” contest announced that they have discontinued the contest. Votes will no longer be [...]

FOR MORE MURPHY ON SEX, GO TO HTTP://pithycomment.com – You have probably deduced that eGrumps has been accused of being fixated on the subject of this posting, hence more of the same on the pithycomment.com  web site, his other subprime website. “Fixated” is probably too strong a work, but maybe not. Please don’t tell Mrs. [...]

Washington, D. C. November 6, 2009                        (Sarcastic Comment by eGrumps) The new Obamacare – Pelosicare – Reidcare (take your pick) is creating a massive dilemma for most Americans, including yours truly. No, I am not talking about the fact that the length of the bill exceeds the guidelines posted by President Obama (see my comment [...]

Washington D. C., October 30, 2009                    (Sarcastic Comment by eGrumps) The White House (“WH”) proudly announced that the Health Care Bill (“Obamacare”) presented by Speaker Pelosi to the American people met all governmental criteria.  More important than the size of the fiscal deficit that would follow [...]

The best one-line jokes on the web can be found at: www.pithycomment.com Another sub-prime web site from eGrumps Updated Daily (usually)(well, usually)  ___________________________________________________________________