Important Announcement: In conformity with the proposed FTC guidlines regarding disclosure, eGrumps (for all of his suprime websites) has agreed to disclose any freebies or other promotional consideration he receives in connection with products mentioned on his web sites. It’s a matter which is long overdue and eGrumps personally endorses it. He has urged his fellow bloggers to come clean and report not only future payoffs, but past ones as well. The fact that no one has even offered him any consideration or freebies of any type, and probably never will,  has nothing to do with his position. It is a matter of principle with him. Way to go, FTC!!!!

 Of course, if someone makes an offer, he may reconsider his position and perhaps even change his archaic  principles and endorse the First Amendment to the U. S. Constituion.  There is no sense in being dogmatic about these things. Ford, Chrysler, GM,  Mercedes, Lexus, Toyota, all auto manufacturers - do you hear? Are you listening? I’ll change – make eGrumps an  offer, any offer, and we will talk. Truth be known, eGrumps can be had – at the right price. Actually, at any price.

Washington D. C. October 2, 2009  (Comment by eGrumps)

On September 29th on www.egrumps.com eGrumps reported on a meeting to take place between President Obama and General McCrystal in Copenhagen while the President was making his presentation to the Olympic Selection Committee. The full text of eGrumps story, titled “Obama, Olympics and Afghanistan,” can be found on his website (Please scroll down).

Today, October 2, 2009, it was announced that a meeting had taken place on Air Force One, in Copenhagen, between Pres. Obama and Gen McCrystal while Pres. Obama was attending the Olympic Selection Committee meeting.

eGrumps categorically denies that he has a mole either in the White House or General M.s headquarters that leaked the story to him.

eGrumps stated “It was just one more example of the Main Stream Media, the Alternative Media, and all other Media, except for me, missing a very important story. I am very grateful to the two psychics on my staff who aided me in this endeavor. I’m sorry I cannot disclose their names because of fear for their safety, but they have once again shown the genius of ignoring conventional thought processes to discern the future. I only hope that Obamacare will pay these mediums for the very patriotic services they are rendering to their patients, oops – their clients.”

The FBI and the CIA, all other intelligence services, the White House and General McCrystal’s staff have all refused to comment. The Department of Homeland Security has asked me about taking a job with them. Because of security constraints I cannot comment.

Copenhagen, Denmark, October 1, 2009 (Satire Commentary by eGrumps)

President Obama advised the Olympic Selection Committee that if they chose Chicago as the site of the 2016 Olympics that he would see that a new event would be added to the competition:

       Synchronized Gang Violence

He thought that this was a competition uniquely available to Chicago and, if the Committee wantd, they could have both men’s and women’s competiton. The venue was readily available – downtown Chicago.

One of his aides was heard to say: “What a brilliant idea. Only President Obama could have come up with this thought, and he certainly has the experience in Chicago as to the practicallity of putting together competitive teams. America should be proud of his creativity”

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Washington, D.C., September 29, 2009 (Satire Commentary by eGrumps)

With the Commanding General in Afghanistan, on 60 Minutes, saying he had only talked to the President once, President Obama requested that the General meet him in Copenhagen to discuss Afghanistan. While he was in Copenhagen to discuss Chicago’s bid to host the Olympics, he felt sure he could fit some time in to talk to the General.

The President’s staff requested that he not wear his uniform since it would put America in a bad light with the Olympic Committee.       Read more…

A few of Murphy’s Laws:

eGrumps Law: Compared to eGrumps, Murphy is a genius”. 
Murphy’s Comment: “For once I agree with that idiot, eGrumps. He’s smarter than I thought.”

Murphy’s Law of Thermodynamics:  Everything gets worse under pressure.

Murphy’s Constant:  Matter will be damaged in direct proportion to its value.

Some of Murphy’s Technology Laws:
    Technology is dominated by those who manage what they do not understand.
    Logic is a systematic way of coming to the wrong conclusion with confidence.
    All great discoveries are made by mistake.
    If it is not in the computer, it doesn’t exist.
    Any given program when running is obsolete.
    Work smarder and not harder and be careful of yor speling.
     A failure will not appear until the product has passed final inspection.

Murphy’s Law of Construction: Don’t force it, get a larger hammer.

Murphy’s Law of Divine Intervention:  The success of any venture will be helped by payer, even in the wrong denomination.

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In all the debate about who has health insurance, who does not, why he or she does or does not have health insurance- eGrumps submits the wrong question is being asked.

The basic issue is whether some are not getting adequate health care, not who has medical insurance or not, and if they are not, what can be done about it.

I believe the overwhelming majority of people are getting adequate health care under our present system, although that is not based upon any statistical analysis – assuming you can define what is “adequate” health care in the first place. People are not dying in the streets – people are not getting thrown out of emergency rooms. People are getting medical treatment, even if they can’t afford it, and may have to go into debt to pay for it – but I believe it is, in the main, available.

If the question is framed that way – not whether or not they have, or can get,  health insurance – but whether they are, or not,  getting “adequate” treatment,  the solution is much easier to find without destroying America’s medical system. More clinics, anyone, for the less advantaged (to use a politically correct term). There are other things that can be done, but that’s far beyond the scope of this comment.

All I’m suggesting is that the debate should be refocused.

In the drive to get Obamacare enacted in some form, President Obama in his speach, said the 30,000,000 “cannot” get health insurance. Peter Orszag, head of the Office of Management and Budget, said that figure was based upon “Census Bureau data.”

Wrong, wrong, wrong – the Census Bureau does not report who “cannot” get health insurance. It reports only on the number of people who do not have health insurance. It is a rather big leap to say that merely because one does not have health insurance, the lack of health insurance was based on the fact that it was unattainable.

The 30,000,000 figure may, or may not be, accurate – but it is certainly not supported by Census Bureau data. Perhaps it would not be amiss for the Washington Press Corps, to keep its somewhat tarmished integrity intact,  might ask the President’s Press Secretary where that figure came from.

One would think that passing such important legislation should be based on accurate figures, not misrepresented figures, whether such misrepresentation was intentional or not.

This was “borrowed” from www.pithycomment.com. It’s worth repeating:

When you think of the debt the next generation must pay off, it is no wonder a  baby yells when it is born.

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Washington, D. C. , September 18, 2009  (Commentary by eGrumps)

When eGrumps was young, sometime in the Middle Ages, his Mother used to say to him when he exaggerated, or(gasp!) even lied to her, that he was full of prunes. I don’t know the derivation of that phrase, I can only guess what it means, and it certainly isn’t used today – except by we old Geezers. – but it seems appropriate to apply it to the comments of President Obama, ex-President Carter and Speaker Pelosi .

President Obama has said that those opposed to ObamaCare  have “misinformation,” their concerns are “false” and are based upon “demagoguery,”    Read more…

eGrumps favorite (often ignored by eGrumps): When all else fails, read the instructions.

Nothing is as easy as it looks.

Every solution breeds new problems.

After all is said and done, a hell-of-a lot more is said than done.

If mathematically you end up with a wrong answer, try multiplying by the page number.

All things are possible, except skiing through a revolving door.

If it is not in the computer, it doesn’t exist.

“MURPHY WAS AN IDIOT” — (Mrs. Murphy)

Washington, D.C. September 13, 2009  (Commentary by eGrumps)

President Obama has stated that by cutting out all of the waste, fraud and abuse in the Medicare program, enough will be saved to pay for ObamaCare, no matter what form ObamaCare will take. A careful review of the facts by eGrumps has concluded that if eGrumps is kicked out of the Medicare program, enough waste (not abuse or fraud, certainly) will be eliminated to pay for ObamaCare in 2012. The fact that ObamaCare does not start until 2013 shows just how smart our President is.

After initially feeling that the goal of a revenue neutral ObamaCare was not realistic, a careful review by eGrumps has concluded that it is well within reach. If all of eGrumps friends, whose lives have been complete wastes, are kicked out of  Medicare, ObamaCare will be solvent for generations.

It is a win/win situation for America.

Washingto, D. C. September 7, 2009

In response to President Obama’s speech to the Little Tykes of America (aka school children), eGrumps has been asked to address them in their classrooms, the same as the President is going to do.  I have been advised by the organizing committee that I am free to say what I want without fear of retribution from the IRS, the FBI, the CIA, the NIC, the White House Press Corps or the U. S. Marines. . No holds are to be barred and nothing will be off limits in my talk.  Like the U S Constitution says, I will have Freedom of Speech. I’ve been working on my presentation. Right now I am having a bit of trouble deciding on the proper attire. like whether I should wear a tie or not. I am mindful of the old saying that no one has ever had a constructive thought with a noose around his neck.

The only thing that is still up in air is the time of my presentation. It will be sometime between five o’clock and eight o’clock Saturday night. I’m told it is Prime Time.

Sacramento, CA, September 2, 2009 (Commentary by eGrumps)

Administrative Alert: Because of the save-the-environment-from-imminent-disaster movement eGrumps has decided to twiterize this report. Abbreviations will be used to save letters. Since letters are soon to be declared an endangered species, eGrumps wants to get ahead of the curve. The eGrumps Editorial Board decided it was not feasible to limit the number of letters used, like Twitter, but that was no reason not to try to economize by being, as much as possible, environmentally friendly without confusing its readers. For example, the Board decided that CGASDTRC (California Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger (hereafter “Gov”)decided to release convicts) would be fairly incomprehensible so the site could not go totally green despite its obvious benefits. That was no reason, however, they felt not to try to eliminate letters where possible).  EGrumps with his less-than compassionate approach to life, stated “If anyone has any trouble understanding the abbreviations ‘Live With It.’”)

eGrumps Commentary: At a secret meeting of the grand bozos who run California (now know as The Great Insolvent State of California (hereafter “GISOC”) a unique plan was devised, rooted in contemporary history to (i) reduce the  number of prisons, (ii) release, and clear, a substantial number of prisoners from overcrowded prisons, and (iii) not incidentally, save the GISOC a substantial amount of money.   Read more…

The trouble with becoming an IRS Agent, 95% of them give the rest a bad name.

The difference between tax avoidance and tax evasion – the jail walls.

Letter to the IRS:
After hearing a sermon on Sunday, a man wrote the following to the IRS:
“I have been unable to sleep, knowing that I have cheated on my income tax. I understand my taxable income and have enclosed a check for $150.00.
If I still can’t sleep, I’ll send in the rest.”

For every tax problem there is a solution which is straightforward, uncomplicated and wrong.

Q: “How many tax advisors does it take to change a lighbulb?”
A: “In the summer there is a tax deductable convention in Hawaii, dealing with this issue.”

Washington D. C., Agust 25, 2009  (Commentary by eGrumps)

In regard to the now pending rather nebulous health care bills, Washington is wondering which statement of a former President of the United States is President Obama following — Abraham Lincoln or George W. Bush:

Abraham Lincoln: You can fool some of the people all of the time, and all of the people some of the time, but you can not fool all of the people all of the time. or

George W. Bush: “You can fool  some of the people all the time, and those are the ones you want to concentrate on.”

(I’m not sure Pres. Bush ever said those words, but it is urban legend that he did, so who am I to argue with that.)

Las Vegas is laying 10 to 1 that Obama is following the quotation of President Bush – hard to believe. He may deny it, but facts are facts.

Washington, D. C. August 19, 2008 (Commentary by eGrumps)

The Obama Administration in a desperate effort to balance the budget and eliminate the negative fiscal effect of “Universal Health Care,” has proposed allowing Americans (but not illegals) to purchase, in advance, prepaid medical junkets for overseas treatment. Anticipating a possible, though remote, rationing of medical care, the Administration intends to sell packaged trips to advanced medical care facilities in Switzerland, India and soon-to-be built clinics in Tijuana, Mexico.

The overseas medical facilities will be staffed, 100%, by American doctors and nurses who do not want to accept the reimbursement rate the government intends to pay for services they would otherwise perform in the United States.. The cost of the junket will include air-fare, medical care at an approved facility, hotel room for a spouse, and all medical treatment. The cost structure is being worked on. Read more…

Washington D. C., August 18, 2009  (Commentary by eGrumps)

In a remarkable example of how not to represent a client, the Department of Justice (“DOJ”) has filed a brief in the case of a gay couple suing the federal government to invalidate the Defense of Marriage Act which was enacted by Congress in 1996. 

The DOJ position will satisfy neither those in favor of gay marriages nor those opposed to them.

The DOJ has said in their brief that they are required by law to defend federal statutes as long as reasonable arguments can be made for their constitutionality (Score One Point for those opposed to Gay Marriage). They also said  that, although it is required by law to support the law, “even if it disagrees with a particular statute as a policy matter, as it does here” (Score One Point for those in favor of Gay Marriage).     Read more…

Washington, D. C., August 14, 2009 (Commentary by eGrumps)

Bowing to popular pressure, President Obama, after stating that there were no “Death Panel” provisions in any portion of the proposed Obamacare health bills, has ordered the non-existing provisions deleted from the proposed law. No longer  would “dying with dignity” be considered, rather “dying without dignity” would be the operative criteria.

In lieu of the removal of such non-existent provisions, he has announced that the new Law, whatever its final form, would establish “End Game Commissions.”      Read more…

Washington D. C., August 11, 2009 (Commentary by eGrumps)

President Obama and his Administration are taking a number of steps to educate the public and prevent misinformation from distorting the true facts about health care reform. An Administration spokesman said the President was greatly disturbed by the number of people dying on the streets, in their homes, in their offices, in the ERs and even in the hospital rooms because our health care system was broken. Concern over fiscal matters cannot interfere with the reality of this crisis. The Administration has therefore come up with a number of solutions to correct the disinformation that is poisoning the public debate.

1. Because of the large number of senior citizens (especially the very elderly in wheel chairs)           Read more…

Washington D.C, August 7, 2009 (Commentary by eGrumps)

The House of Representatives has decided to spend $550,000,000 to buy about 8 Gulfstream Jets (The exact number proposed is not quite clear). The Air Force had requested only 1 Gulfstream Jet. Read more…